Monday, March 17, 2008

Why are you so angry?

I was in line behind some guy at 7-eleven today who makes ME look patient.

He went from under his breath grumbling to full on F-bomb dropping in a blink of an eye when the sales clerk took just a little too long to select just the right big bite for another customer. Finally he threw down $5 and yelled Gimme five on the van. I guess that's when things started to make sense.

1) Nobody likes to wait -- This was the step that primed the pump
2) He was driving a mini-van -- That is a powdered keg for almost anyone under 35
3) He only had five dollars for gas -- What is that, like a gallon and a half?

The combination of these three things pretty much set the stage for a FOX 5 breaking news event if I ever saw one.

I dunno. Maybe he was also having a bad day to boot. Perhaps a little too much St. Patty's day celebration, maybe he is the victim of some crazy rumor. The possibilities are endless.

Maybe some of you are asking, what kind of rumor could be that enraging? Well as an example, and I am not saying this rumor did get started, but it very easily could have, this past weekend we caught up with some old friends for 30th birthday party.

One of invities named "Matty" called to indicate that he had a blast at the DC 101Shamrockfest and was absolutely piss-bent and would not be making it to the party. I think the message went like this. HJBIOP fqoi ewrrivf qwioecn9pqper oernpwerv. Dill pickles.

About five minutes later, in a different conversation someone spoke of how their dog "Maddie" pooped out a sock earlier in the day.

You don't have to be a rocket scientist to see the potential implications of someone overhearing Mattie got bombed and Maddie pooped a sock.

I think that is precisely the type of rumor worthy of dropping an F-bomb or two at a slow poke big bite wrangler.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Am proud my dog made it into blog posting. I can't believe she got so bombed, but that's nothing when compared to a grown man pooping out a sock