Rap is something you do, Hip Hop is a way of life...

There is a pretty cool exhibit on display at the Smithsonian National Portrait Gallery through late October which features Hip Hop and contemporary Portraiture. The exhibit contains a blend of photographs, Graffiti, and modern intepretations of classic portraits using Hip Hop icons. The exhibit is somewhat limited, leaving you wanting more, but that is probably more of a tribute to the artist's originality and a desire to see more, than the exhibit being truly lacking.

It is interesting to see Hip Hop embraced at this level, given that for so long it was considered more of a sub-culture (if not a total counter-culture). Twenty years ago, this sort of graffiti was considered vandalism and it's creators the dregs of society. Now it is on display in the same building which houses one of the most famous paintings of George Washington.

There is an interesting bit to that as well.

We had a hard time making our way to the wing which features the portraits of the presidents. There was a hugh bottleneck at the bathrooms before you reached that wing. Why the bottleneck?

Well in the hallway, above the water fountian is a portrait of Steven Colbert in front of a portrait of Steven Colbert in front of a portrait of Steven Colbert (see random photo plucked from Google images above).

After first being rejected by the National Museum of American History, Colbert petitioned the Smithsonian to display his portrait, who agreed to "go along with the joke," though they stress that it is only temporary. Colbert said "I don't mean to brag, but as it contains three portraits, my portrait has more portraits than any other portrait in the National Portrait Gallery." (Wikipedia).

Now here is the real kicker. Despite the portrait being a bit of a "joke" and the Smithsonian's reluctance to display it, the crowd waiting to get a glimpse of it was easily ten-fold of that found in front of ANY of the portraits in the presidential wing. I would wager that portrait is fully driving a third of the traffic to the museum, if not more.

Something tells me Colbert would be pleased.

Why must you tease me?

Pabst just sponsored at art contest, and just look at the blue ribbon submission.

Tip of the cap to you Mr. Conway. And thanks for planting that image in my head, 5 months before crab season is in full swing.

Signs you still need to grow up...

You find this article laugh out loud funny, because the two ladies couldn't handle the slippery weenie.

Signs you are getting old...

You look across the parking lot and see a car and think to yourself, "Damn, that is a good looking car."

Only to get closer and realize it is a Volvo.

In my defense, a Volvo has no right looking this good:

This isn't the exact car I saw, but it comes pretty close. The one I saw was a swank Leguna Seca Blue (a color typically seen on high-end BMW M3's).

Looked a bit more like this (although with the stock wheels in the picture above or the painted grill--both are poor additions in my opinion stock looks much better).

I wonder if the Swedes are trying to give the German's a run for their Deutche Marks, er, I mean Euro.

Thanks for nothing, Lost

After damn near a year, I was expecting a bit more.

I didn't expect all the answers, but a couple would have been nice.

What did you deliver?

Nada.

And you took an hour of my time.

Honestly, I have had more interesting bowel movements than those 60 pointless minutes.

You know what hurts me the worst?

That we only get 8 freaking episodes. You think if you are only going to come out with half a season, you at least make sure it is dud free, and that you BRING IT with the first episode.

Season four current tally:

Good Shows = 0
Steaming Turds = 1

Yeah thanks a lot Lost.

Why don't you just go ahead and kill off Locke while you are at it.

Taco de Chapulines

My love of tacos only goes so far.

On a recent adventure I came across tacos de chapulines which in the menu were described as legendary. I guess they forgot to further qualify that as being legendarily gross.

You see, Taco de chapulines are, in fact, grasshopper tacos. It was a $4.50 adventure. How could I say no? Well, actually, just by saying no. I guess I was hoping they would somehow taste really good, defying my expectations in a chocolate covered pretzel kind of way.

Nope. Not even close.

There is a reason they make people eat crap like that on reality TV.

A dinner-mate best described them as tasting, hoppy, no pun intended (I think). They had a real earthy, bitter grassy taste, not unlike hops in beer. Two bites were more than sufficient to satiate my curiosity. Thankfully my back-up dish came through in a big way, mussels steamed in Tequila and garlic with a chipotle sauce.

After 1 taste adventure you would think I would have learned my lesson, well at least for the day, right?

Wrong.

Adventure #2

A scottish ale made with seaweed, as recommended by Lincoln, the beer hop at the Brick Skeller, a brew pub with more of the creature than one can fathom. Here is a sampling of their wares.

Ole kelpie was heads and shoulders above that hot mess of a taco, but sadly dissappointing for a $13 beer. Low ABV content, wish-washy aftertaste, and no real hint of seaweed to speak of. Rather, it sort of tasted like a cross between a porter and a bottle of aquafina.

Alas, despite the taco fiasco and half-stepping beer, the rest of weekend adventure was about as good as it gets.

Good friends, Ansel Adams, Hot Wings, Irish Car Bombs, Box seats at a hockey game, and our very own table at a packed night spot. One can not complain too much. chirp chirp chirp.

REMIX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I heart snow days!

Soup to nutters

Of the various phrases that people wield conversationally that just sort of bug me is soup to nuts.

I don't know if my disdain stems from the idea of someone teabagging my boston clam chowder or that the first person I knew who used it regularly was a royal douchebag. Eitherway I just am not a big fan.

I have, however, been curious to its origin. I knew for some odd, unexplainable reason that it was the title of the very first episode of the Three Stooges, but that seemed to have very little bearing on the context in which that phrase is used.

Thanks to some e-search, I discovered that the phrase references the progression of a typical middle eastern meal (or typical of a traditional meal at some point in time), which would begin with an appetizer consisting of some form of soup, a main course, and a dessert which often featured nuts. Thus the phrase reflects the full course of a meal, from beginning to end, and has extended to reflect the full course of action in whatever context it is used.

We had a catered lunch today and in addition to your typical plate of chocolate chip cookies was a platter of delicious treats from here.

You CAN NOT go wrong with those. Well maybe with the one flavored with rosewater.

In an odd measure of synchronicity some dropped the soup to nuts phrase following lunch, and I challenged them on whether or not they knew the origin, and they did not, so I had to drop some knowledge on they azz. Booya!

It makes me wonder how often people non-chalantly throw around words or phrases they have no clue of what they really mean, only a vague understanding of their context.

Probably more often than not.

Solomon Asch would further stress the importance of context as being equal to, if not greater than the social act which occurs therein. One of my favorite quotes of his states:

Most social acts have to be understood in their setting and lose meaning of isolated. No error in thinking about social facts is more serious than failure to see their place and function.

I like that. That's nice. Like reunite on ice.

Under that wise, wise saying I have a picture of that guy who jumped into the Lion's den in a zoo in Taipei to try and convert the lions into Christians but then got bitten.

I think there is some relevant connection there.

Or maybe that dude is just plain old school nutters.

Baby's Laughter, You are on NOTICE!

Some will say there is nothing in life more precious than a baby's laughter.

Those noobs have obviously not experienced the enlightenment that is Call of Duty 4, online using the playstation 3. I would not describe myself as a serious gamer, much less a First Person Shooter (FPS) gamer, but after an hour playing a few online death matches I think I have seen the light.

Despite my complete and utter lack of skill and access to high power weapons available to high ranking players, I am content to lurk in the shadows (aka laying in the cut) with my shiv waiting to shank an unsuspecting player. I am getting pretty shank-tastic although my victories are almost always short lived, thanks to some A-hole with a sniper rifle hiding on a roof several virtual blocks away.

It is even funnier when kats are rocking headsets to talk smack and you roll up on them with the kak kak kak and hear them go UGGH! WTF!

As good as the game is, its true purpose is training season for the forthcoming end all be all installment of grand theft auto 4, which I predict is going to be a "where were you when 2 pac got shot*" kind of defining moment.

* BTW I was in Kennedy's car outside of the pantry, sipping on a 40, on my bid night.

Beyond Description

Anyone remember the movie terminator?

Sure you do, the flick where the artificial intelligence of machines eventually becomes so great, they decide they no longer need humans?

Well if you can imagine that movie staring toilets instead of Cyborgs, this is probably how it would begin.

The Honorable Hamm gave me the heads up to a previously unknown, nay, unfathomable world of high performance toilets, of which, Kohler proudly calls itself "The Performance Leader in Global Toilets."

You think this is a joke. You have no idea. I think I will be forever a changed man after viewing that site (like a 2 cups, 1 girl kind of way, only without the horror).

Their crowning jewel is the Class 5 EST Performance Toilet.

When I saw the title, I couldn't decide if the Class 5 is a nod to White Water Rapids or a Klingon Warship. Either apply equally. It looks as if the flushing power of that beast could choke down the most titanic of turds and its 1970's Burt Reynolds good looks of the tank allow it to seemlessly "cloak" into the most swank decor.

No one knows for sure what EST but after watching this video, I would bet it is an acronym for Enormous Shit Transporting. For the love of pete, did they just flush an entire toy chest of Pokemon balls down the drain?

Grab bag

Hey Kiddos!

It's been a while, so I have a few things I need to getz squared away since I have been neglecting ye olde blog as of late.

First, time for the news years resolution, to give more props...

Props to D & J who have their fishless aquarium posted on Ratemyaquarium.com yup a site to post, view, and vote on aquariums. Theirs is out there somewhere. If you stumble across one that looks like the roman coloseum, show them the vote love.


Next, props to JN for the tightest holiday card not featuring Billy Dee Williams (see above).

Knuckle pound to baby Jesus.


Next, props to Burr for getting married, but stopping off to race go karts first. Also, props to me, t-15 AKA Shake-N-Bake for turning in the 2nd fastest time. The fastest was spanky who sold his sole to the devil for the fastest time (I think).

Not sure if it is exactly "props" worthy but I did see a billboard for a website called http://www.notyourmothersmammogram.com/ while enroute to PA.

Props to G & N for a fun night out on the town complete with PBR and a letterman jacket with more medals than Mr. T, include one for Hulk Hogan leg drops.

Props to K-Lou for deciding to go to Ibiza before knowing it is the um-che-oom-che-oom-che foam club party capital of the world. Actually the whole London-Budapest-Ibiza excursion leads me to believe she is secretly a club DJ. I've got my eye on you DJ K-weezy.

Props to the wife for many fine Christmas gifts including but not limited to a device called: "How many days ago did you open that food." I could explain, but just trust me. It's real. It's cool. More information here.

Another reason I love and give mad propa-loppaz to da Sheetz. I saw these on sale, at the counter, as an impulse buy purchase.

Props for everyone.

Except the new American Gladiators show.

I just watched it and wish my eyeballs were getting lasered right now. It is plain awful. Too much chatter, not enough batter. I don't give 2 shizzles for the contestant's perspective, just get in that giant hampster ball and start running.

Damn you writers strike. Damn you!

Farewell good friend

After a long, hard, well fought 3 year battle with Kidney Disease, we had to let a member of the T-15 clan go yesterday.

Despite never quite mastering the jumping through the hula-hoop trick, Ms. Bailey Peabody AKA Rosa Parks AKA Officer Hooks AKA Darth Bailey truly was more of a cat and companion than we could have ever asked for.

You will be truly missed.

Um, so what's up with that creepy baby?

On a recent adventure to Dallas, I decided to read the airline magazine to pass time while enroute. While flipping through the pages I saw the most disturbing image of the blinged out baby and seeing as it is the season of sharing, I wanted to pass that along to each and everyone of you. No need to thank me.

All in all, it was a pretty good haul this year. I need to take some pictures of some of my more interesting gifts, as words won't do them justice.

Stay tuned.

Happy Holidays!

Are you feeling tough?

24.

One superbad bullet dodged...

When the previews for superbad first started to play, I had virtually no interest in seeing the movie. However, as time passed, I began hearing all sorts of positive feedback from reputable and not-so-reputable sources alike. It got enough street cred among enough of my associates that I decided to give the movie a go, but I never had time while it was in the theaters. Recently it was released on DVD and I was so close to making a blind purchase since I had heard so much good stuff about it.

Thank what ever diety you worship I did not. I know I am going to catch flak from some folks, but that movie was straight up lame. It is not that the movie was bad. It just wasn't good. Kind of like a sub from subway. Except that the reasons subs from subway are tolerable is that they are fast, cheap, and healthy. There wasn't much to justify the lack of goodness I have been so eagerly expecting. Thank you netflix, from saving me from that purchase.

My purchase luck ran out there though.

This past weekend I attended a friend's holiday party and wanted to bring along a little bit of the seasonal Sam Adam's joy that is Old Fezziwig's Ale. That is a beer that is so tasty, it makes you want to slap Jim Koch's Mama. The kicker is, the only way to get Ole Fezzi, is to buy the holiday sampler for $16 and that only comes with 2 bottles, in theory.

Why "in theory?"

Well much to my dismay, my sampler only had 1 fezziwig. The other was mysteriously swapped with a scotch ale (which is also delicious, but much more widely available). And one of my cream stouts was switched with a brown ale. It was like a TJ maxx or Marhsall's case of beer, slightly irregular, and should have been clearly labelled and discounted as such. That makes me want to slap Jim Koch.

I sent their website an email, so we'll see where we go with that one.

Also, happy birthday Joshiebear.

Reason # 406 I loves the Internet...

While I am not certain why, I can only assume that the approaching holiday season triggered the memory of a toy I remember seeing as a much younger topic15. A toy I never owned, but wanted to for a long time.

I could not remember its name, but a quick google search on 1980s toys programmable vehicle revealed the one and only Big Trak.

Technically it was a toy of the late 1970's, but its futuristic style wore well into the early 1980's. Essentially it was a thinking man's remote control car.

It did not have an external remote, rather the top of the Big Trak contained a key pad which you could program a series of commands to tell the Big Trak what to do, Go forward 10 steps, turn left, reverse 2 steps, fire the proton cannon 200 times.

As a kid I wanted one of these (or at least I think I did). Now, being older and seeing a video of one in action, I would assume the capabilities did not justify whatever price it was sold at...

Stick to your knitting, Subway

Subway, we need to talk. Your latest efforts are going to confuse consumers. You can not position yourself as purveyor of healthy eats, and support fitness then throw a sandwich called "the feast" on your menu and have Quahog's favorite portly son promote it.

I love Family Guy, but Peter Griffen is not the face of healthly choices.

It's like when cadillac tried to get into the business of selling small cars. Nobody wants a small caddy and nobody goes to subway to pig out on delicious subs, because well, quite frankly there subs taste like shit.

Get ready to learn something new, Part II of II

For those of you who were interested in seeing the Suge Knight Christmas video and click on the link in the previous post.

Congrats!

You just got rick rolled!

Apparently, this has become the latest rage in online practical joking. The premise is as follows, you lure an unsuspecting mark to the site under false pretense of seeing some sort of amazing video or latebreaking news. As soon as the victim arrives at the site, they are bushwhacked, er, greeted by that damn Rick Astley video.

According to the stats on youtube, some 3 million folks have been rick rolled to date, and the number grows daily.