Can anyone think of a better way to burn off a few extra minutes waiting for some friends to get home than taking Melady, The Guvness and Nabob to the rec field parking lot across the street to do some doughnuts in a station wagon? Only to get disapproving looks from the neighbors?
One of the things on my big ole list of things to do before I expire is to learn how to do a proper doughnut preferably without wrapping my car around a telephone pole or a Lindy sapling.
What's a Lindy sapling you ask?
Well it's only one of my mom's most favorite trees and quite a resilient breed at that. You see, a few years back, melady and I were on our way to a local state park for some hiking. We got about .4 miles from my parents house before she realized shoes would be a good addition to our hike. So I pulled a u turn and headed back to the house for proper footwear.
About 2 houses away, I asked, want to try something fun? She said OK.
Naturally I floored it, turned the wheel and pulled the e-brake in hopes of 180'ing into the driveway.
Now I am no math wiz, but I am pretty sure I missed the 180 by approximately 135 degrees, thus shooting the car directly in the line of site of the only baby tree in my parents yard. My mom's favorite tree. The lindy sapling. The tree that grows .5 inches annually. The tree that is old as me but only 3 feet tall and as thick as a pack of rolo's. The tree that was no match for my Mazda MX-6 GT Turbo.
Ole Lindy never saw it coming.
As I looked back I saw skid marks across the lawn, over the tree (now on the ground) right up to where my car was parked.
Oh Shizer, I better move the car, but what to do about the tree?
Simple, I ran over a propped the top half back up like nothing happened. Miraculously it stood on its own (or so it would until my dad's next lawn mowing excursion where the slightest brush with the John Deere would cause the tree to fold like a house of cards).
I felt bad about setting my pop up to be the patsy, so I came clean and told dear ole mom.
My mother had a puzzled look when she came outside and saw a pair of tire tracks on each side of the tree, but the tree was still standing. It was like an MC Escher painting. You saw the driverside tire track on the right of the tree, the passenger side on the left, but an upright tree in the middle. She didn't understand. Then she touched the tree and it fell like a wet noodle and I got the "OH BEN!"
I told here the spirit was strong in the tree and it would comeback. And it did. Sorta. It now stands proudly 8 inches above the ground.
Anyhow, happy Arbor day.
No it's not really Arbor day.