Like padlocking a dog turd...

“Transformers” was shipped to theaters on seven reels in two separate cases under the name "Cobra."

Several of the reels were shipped in cans that had a timelock on it. Motion picture presentation specialists could build up the trailers and the first three reels, but had to wait until a certain date and time before they could open the second can and build up the rest of the print. This would prevent any pre-release screenings that could end up being captured by another device (like a camcorder).

Film reels four through seven were locked with a master-lock combination four-digit lock. The combination to this lock is director Michael Bay's birthday, 0217 or Febuary 17th.

Ok, ok, the padlocking a turd was a bit harsh. The movie was not all that bad. Overall, it was what one would expect, generically, from a summer movie. Cool cars, good looking people, explosions and a camaro peeing on a government agent.

Ooops. I probably should have called spoiler on that last one.

I liked a lot about the movie. For instance, Bernie Mac's onsite petting zoo at Bobby Bolivia's used car lot.

Or watching the fatman play DDR then run through a sliding glass door while trying to escape the man.

Or maybe the loose cannon cop who grills little whitwicky when the cop flashes his gun "what's up 50 cent, you eyeballin my piece? What you gonna do about it?"

All of this equity was squandered in one fell swoop when they gave megatron teeth. WTF Michael Bay? First you give Optimus Prime lips (gross). And now this? You better have some good explanation for this in the sequel.

Perhaps, as a young robot, Megatron was gyped by the cybertronian tooth fairy. Or maybe had a bad experience with the dentist. All shaping young 'tron to become the villian he grew up to be.